Guest Blogger: Meaning of Love

 

Hello my Dear Soul Adventurers, 
An anonymous guest blogger has allowed me to share this intimate piece in our community- our safe space. What it means to love is a pretty tricky concept. How do we know what someone means when they say " I love you"? What do you mean when you say "I love you"? Love as a noun and how we communicate it as a verb can often get lost in translation. 
What I mean by "I love you" 
 by Anonymous 
People don’t explore and define what it means to say, “I love you” to someone enough. For most people it is a sequence of language that follows, “I like you”. For others it’s a way of getting what you want. Some people don’t think about it at all and say it all their lives. Not defining our terms is almost as bad as the tendency people have to categorize all of their relationships.
When I say I love you, it means that I am interested and invested in you becoming the best version of yourself. I want you to have a full life, to be happy and healthy (physically, emotionally, mentally, etc), I want to help you do what you say you want to do, and I am willing to give you parts of me, time and energy so that you can have those things. When I say I love you it means I am going to be thinking about how I can give and contribute to your life more than what I can get from you. I think one of the things that people gloss over is to take the time to understand how someone needs to be loved. There are some people that need to be loved in a certain way as far as their journey to a fuller life. Some people may have some needs met but not others and so the best way I can love them is to contribute what I can give or what they are missing if I am able to give that. There are a lot of things that I think people really don’t need when it comes to love. For the most part, people don’t need/want to be controlled. People don’t need/want to be dominated (unless you’re into that sort of thing). For me, part of love is to affirm the individuality of the other person, that they are on their own track and going through their own things and again, they don’t fit into a box or a category. There have been times where I realise that loving someone just means listening and accepting them and that’s what they need to feel loved. I can’t think of a situation where my being jealous helps contribute to someone’s life. I guess the one exception would be if I felt jealousy because I didn’t think that the other person had the person’s best interests at heart and then it’s an issue of wanting the person I love to be healthy and have healthy relationships. Cultivate love in yourself and recognise it in others. Surround yourself with people who understand what it means to love.
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What do you mean by "I love you" leave your thoughts in the comment section below
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Comments

  1. That is exactly how I feel when I utter those words. My personal challenge is not using my love to change but instead to understand.

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    1. Yes, it is important to honour the person you love just as they are.

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  2. Great post! And a question I think many of us have asked ourselves often. This makes me want to get clear on my view of love...being a feeler type of person, to me it feels like the words free and expansive... This post gives some food for thought!

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    1. Yes, honoring the other person is important. Through all of their stages as long as the relationship is healthy and based on respect for both people.

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  3. Love is, to me, loving myself first before I love someone else. From loving myself I can then love another. With saying "I love you", I'm telling the person, as you stated, I'm investing in you, in us ,and want to see the best version of them.

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    Replies
    1. So true, we must fill our cup first until it overflows enough to give to another.

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